I've always wanted to postsomething to keep my blog rolling, but it's starting to get difficult. Instead of being happy and joyful when I blog, I'm finding it rather a pain to watch it stuck yet I've virtually nothing to share. You know, it's something like watching somebody dying and you have no idea how to perform CPR.
That got me thinking: Why do I even start a blog in the first place?
Was it to upload a gazillion of photos to tell the whole world about the party that I've been? Or, to rant and complain when life gets tough and I've got no one to talk to? Or, to share my happiness when something great happened?
And, I got my answer.
It's all that and more. Initially, blogging was merely an interest for me but somehow, it has become a part and parcel of my life. Fragments of good and bad times are here in my blog. People reads them; I treasure them. That's what keeps the blog going, though it often gone into phases of unintentional hiatus just because I have nothing to say.
All my life I've been searching for something called PASSION. I felt envious of people who found passion in what they are doing. Dancing, singing, baking, playing sports, playing music, you name it. Me? I still haven't found mine yet.
Heck, I don't even know if whatever I'm studying now is really what I want. I can't seem to find passion in anything I do. Well, of course, I don't plan on dropping out halfway but it's just that... I don't want to just do what I love, but also love what I do. If you get what I mean.
Hmm, will I ever find passion in blogging? Or in fact, anything at all?
Most of my high school friends are in different parts of the world now. Aussie! Canada! UK! New Zealand! And, some of them will be leaving very very soon too.
And then.. all of a sudden, it just hits me.
The people that I used to go to class with, those who shared my high school memories with.. We are all moving on to the next level of our lives already. We are no longer teens anymore. We have hit the big Two-oh.
Sometimes, I wish I could have had the opportunity to leave Malaysia and gain the experience of a lifetime in overseas. I really do. But I guess a part of me is still attached to home. I mean, it's true that I don't study in Penang now but at least, I'm comforted by the idea that I can still go back anytime I want.
That's what they say. Grass is always greener on the other side. =/
And to all my friends who are in/going to overseas now,
all the best and do have the time of your life there before you come back!